From time to time, I write about the quest of the perfect sperm. I have gone through about seven donors over the past 1.5 years. Unlike most of you, when I first began this madness, I did not have the foresight to purchase more sperm viles than I needed for a given cycle.
And what that means is that by the time I picked myself up after a BFN and tried to re-purchase vials of my chosen sperm, I would often discover that my donor had retired or that his sperm had been sold out. Nadia and I have fallen in love with more profiles than we can count on one hand, but we never thought that it would take us over eight cycles to get pregnant, so we never stored any viles.
When you store vials, you have to purchase a certain number of vials and then pay for storage on top of that expense. Being the eternal optimist, I never thought that that kind of financial outlay would be necessary. I was wrong.
The selection process over this past year and a half has morphed over time. Originally, we were interested in finding someone who looked like Nadia and, believe it or not, someone who shared our values. We found the perfect guy, Mr. South American. Oh, we were so naive back then and so in love. We only purchased two viles and when I needed more, we found out that he retired.
Bummer! What a let down on top of a BFN.
After that, with each new cycle, it seemed as if we had to pick ourselves up and move on to a different donors, which was crazy making at times. You would think that we would learn our lesson, but given the fact that I see the glass as half full and given the fact that Nadia doesn't like to waste money, we've had to regroup and review new donor profiles on numerous occasions. I'm proud to say that all of the donors had one thing in common though, high sperm counts.
Even though I compromised many of what once were essential donor traits, there was one attribute that I insisted on having: a history of pregnancy. Nadia and I vacillated on the open and closed donor decision, race, height, and even donor IQ, but we both agreed that we needed someone with a positive track record. During this past year and a half, I've had South American social justice activists, African Americans guitar playing smokers, White engineers and construction workers, but during out last cycle, Nadia and I settled the One, an East Indian donor.
Having been through the egg drop drama six times before, we decided to stock up on this one. So he is the One, he could very well be the biological father of our child. We will use him for our upcoming IVF cycle.
It's a bit odd because neither one of us is East Indian but we feel that we will add an extra dimension to our family. Our child will definately be raised as both South American and Caribbean American by virtue of her parents but s/he will also have a biological connection to a culture we no nothing about. It's going to be quite an adventure.
And I can't wait.
Photo Courtesy: Mahadev.org & Vaishnodevi.com